I am not fighting over crust! Are we baking our own pie or not?

by Angela T. Rye, Esq.

Over the past couple of weeks I, as a member of IMPACT, have been afforded the opportunity to dialogue with tremendous emerging leaders in various social settings. There has been a lot of talk about "blockers", passing the torch (or really, not), and the under-utilization of well qualified members of my peer group. While my ideology has oft been dismissed as too idealistic, too optimistic, or too Booker T-ish, I propose that we begin moving towards baking our OWN pie. I am not saying that I don't need help. I am not even saying that I can't use the talents, resources, and gifts of my peers or my elders because that would be a lie. However, I am saying that we need to HEAVILY consider the importance of recognizing the ingredients before us. I like sweet potato pie, so follow me for a minute (and I know, I know everyone makes it differently). There may be someone with flour, someone else with eggs, someone with whipping cream, butter, vanilla, nutmeg, and of course, the yams! Just because an individual brings the yams to the table does not mean that everyone else is insignificant, but we do need to acknowledge the importance of what our gifts are and be comfortable with OUR gifts.

I am a firm believer that God created us to be inter-dependent. We NEED each other. How can we move beyond the bickering, the fighting, and the hurts of the past into a future with solutions that benefit the greater good?

Tulsa Historical Find!

The African-American past is an iceberg, still 90 percent submerged.
Because so much material remains in family hands or lies piled in the
unvisited attics and basements of libraries, newspapers, and even
police stations, rich discoveries await. Currie Ballard, a historian
in Oklahoma, has just made what he calls "the find of a lifetime"—29
cans of motion picture film dating from the 1920s that reveal the
daily lives of some remarkably successful black communities.

for the full story click here

Are You in Love...Financially?

Financial Lovemaking
By Dr. Boyce Watkins

Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston give Mike Tyson a run for his money inthe "Jack up your life in the 90s contest". Chalky lips and all, these two were the poster children for what you don't want your kids to become when they grow up. What was most ironic was that everyone thought that Bobby was corrupting Whitney, who does an amazing "church girl with the raspy voice" imitation. But church girls don't usually know that "crack is whack", and they don't get caught hauling weed onto an airplane. Well, at least she didn't have box cutters and shaving cream; people who smoke weed don't usually have the motivation to hijack a flight, since they are high enough already.

They were once young and attractive, now they look old and tired. They were once beautiful songbirds, now they just look like jailbirds. Life is getting harsh for these two, and it could get harsher as the "King of R&B" (haha) and his weed-tottin ex-babymama find themselves on the other side of a nasty divorce.

Besides learning that crack is whack, we can learn other lessons from Whitney's confessions. Drugs and bad relationships have huge personal and financial consequences. My forthcoming book "Financial Lovemaking 101: Merging assets with your partner in ways that feel good" hits on some of this, so I thought I would "peep game" and take a quick visit to the Bobby-Whitney School of Life to see what we can all learn from their experience:

Lesson 1: Watch who you decide to marry
The wrong partner may not only ruin you financially, they can also take away other valuable assets beyond money, such as your reputation, well-being and peace of mind. As young as they think they are, their latest pictures show skin of leather and more wrinkles than a wet Barbara Bush. These two people spent the best years of their lives with someone that they may not have wanted to be with. That's more painful than losing cash.

Lesson 2: Determine if your partner has a financial venereal disease
On my site (financiallovemaking.com) I created a test for the Financial Irresponsibility Virus (FIV). If you or your partner has a positive score, you are FIV positive. Destructive financial habits such as drugs or alcohol make it very easy to become FIV positive. I am not one to say that the drug rumors are true. But if there were drugs in this relationship, that is a quick way to end up in the poor house.

Lesson 3: Size does matter (meaning the size of your partner's bank account) – but too much size can be a pain
Some people are excited to have a mate who is well-endowed (financially), but sometimes you are rewarded on the front end but punished on the back. All that extra bling in their account can dull the shine on your smile when you get out of bed every morning. Your partner should make you wealthy in many ways, not just financially.

Lesson 4: Don't spend your time with an enabler of your financially destructive habits.
If you overeat, overspend, or gamble too much, then it might not make sense to "hook up" with someone who does the same thing. You might be as happy as two pigs in a mud puddle, but when the piper comes to collect payment, the payment will be eternal. Find someone who complements you and improves you, not someone who accentuates the parts of you that happen to be most destructive.

Bobby and Whitney have performed a valuable service. By watching them jack up their lives, it has reminded me that my life is not so bad. Perhaps one day, Bobby will rise back to the top of the charts, and Whitney will once again be cranking out number one hits. Yeah, you're right. Even I thought that last line was funny.

Dr. Boyce Watkins is a Finance Professor at Syracuse University. He makes regular appearances in the national media, providing Expertise and social commentary. He has made regular appearances in outlets such as ESPN, USA Today, The New York Times, Smart Money Magazine and Fox News. For more information, please visit www.myfinanceprofessor.com or www.boycewatkins.com.